 "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2, state 5), oil on canvas, 59x31.5 inches {"Life is sweet at the edge of a razor; And down in the front row of an old picture show the old man is asleep as the credits start to roll. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, how's it going to end?" -Tom Waits}  "The Doctrine of Liberty" (2019 No.1, state 14), oil on canvas, 67x59.5 inches {"I believe there is a golden thread which alone gives meaning to the political history of the West, from Marathon to Alamein, from Solon to Winston Churchill and after. This I chose to call the doctrine of liberty under the law." -Anthony Sampson, "The Changing Anatomy of Britain", 1982} "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2) requires a major fix (despite yesterday's numerous alterations). "The Doctrine of Liberty" (2019 No.1) underwent a minor fix yesterday (which I challenge my best viewers to see).
 "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2, state 4), oil on canvas, 57x31.5 inches {"Life is sweet at the edge of a razor; And down in the front row of an old picture show the old man is asleep as the credits start to roll. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, how's it going to end?" -Tom Waits}  Drawing 02·26·2019, pencil on paper, 20x16 inches ...it is a duck! This is way I am approaching the painting "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2). It speaks it own language, not "like a duck," but the analogy is apt. I accept "How's It Gonna End" for what it is. I will follow its calling to its inevitable end.
Yesterday's drawing is complex, yet hits the viewer with a simple draw, its near-centered oval. The viewer can wander however they wish. It is an endless stream of consciousness.  "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2, state 3), oil on canvas, 55x31.5 inches {"Life is sweet at the edge of a razor; And down in the front row of an old picture show the old man is asleep as the credits start to roll. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, how's it going to end?" -Tom Waits}  Drawing 02·24·2019, pencil on paper, 16x20 inches It has been a weird day around here. Strongs wind came, the power went out. The torrid winds are still here; the power is now on. Thus here I post! Most of the day was difficult because my internet servers were out. Now I can show my work from yesterday. "How's It Gonna End" is in state 3; it has great distance to grow and change before it looks remotely correct. Yesterday's drawing did new things; it is very instructive. Frustration with the power outage due to strong winds has left me feeling out of control. I have places to go before I sleep...
 "The Doctrine of Liberty" (2019 No.1, state 13), oil on canvas, 67x59.5 inches {"I believe there is a golden thread which alone gives meaning to the political history of the West, from Marathon to Alamein, from Solon to Winston Churchill and after. This I chose to call the doctrine of liberty under the law." -Anthony Sampson, "The Changing Anatomy of Britain", 1982}  Drawing 02·23·2019, pencil on paper, 20x16 inches I think it was Linus Pauling who said the most important and most necessary attribute to being a successful scientist is to have a lot of ideas. This is also true for artist. I have a lot of ideas. Too many to relentlessly follow all of them. So, I build a lore within myself knowing; There are many fascinating paths not taken. Even with this lots and lore I sometimes feel I am in a lull. I was feeling that way before I began yesterday's drawing. I was thinking I had finished all my recent drawings with a density of pencil marks; I was not letting enough light get through the cracks. Then I made yesterday's drawing; Now I have a lot of ideas. There are many possibilities to where I go next, all of them exciting and enticing.
I must mention, "The Doctrine of Liberty" is now complete! It is a good one because it drives me to ask more questions. I need more answers; There are always lots of places to go.  "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2, state 2), oil on canvas, 55x31.5 inches {"Life is sweet at the edge of a razor; And down in the front row of an old picture show the old man is asleep as the credits start to roll. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, how's it going to end?" -Tom Waits}  Drawing 02·21·2019, pencil on paper, 20x16 inches Questions obliterate any idea there is the possibility of an end. All is now. The future is mute. Destruction is intense; equilibrium is destroyed. Any experience that produced foreknowledge is lost in translation. Thus begins a new work of art. God, I do not know where this is going! I am a new born during each and every instance that is the beginning of a drawing or a painting. It is like awakening in a mudslide; you know it is going downhill, but foreknowledge of its destruction and its creation cannot be known till it comes to rest. This process is not for stable people; it can be viewed more safely from outside the mainstream of the mud.
I have attached a specific quote from Tom Waits' "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2); "Life is sweet at the edge of a razor; And down in the front row of an old picture show the old man is asleep as the credits start to roll. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, how's it going to end?" I revel in the glory of this process called art-making. I do not want my ability to experience it to end. The old picture show, the art that came before, does cause me to fall asleep: "Life is sweet at the edge of a razor."  "How's It Gonna End" (2019 No.2, state 1), oil on canvas, 54x34 inches The painting "How's It Gonna End?" (2019 No.2) begins as usual for these recent times. I have a feeling. I don't know where it's going. How is it going to end? Thank you to Tom Waits for helping me verbalize my consistently mysterious process. I relish this path. I accept the step by step as exciting, a murder mystery unraveling. I killing the white canvas, replacing it with marks, paint and color. "A tree born crooked will never grow straight. She sunk like a hammer into the lake. A long lost letter and an old leaky boat. Promises are never meant to keep. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, How's it going to end?" How's It Gonna End?  "The Doctrine of Liberty" (2019 No.1, state 12), oil on canvas, 67x59.5 inches {"I believe there is a golden thread which alone gives meaning to the political history of the West, from Marathon to Alamein, from Solon to Winston Churchill and after. This I chose to call the doctrine of liberty under the law." -Anthony Sampson, "The Changing Anatomy of Britain", 1982}  Drawing 02·19·2019, pencil on paper, 20x16 inches "The Doctrine of Liberty" is near completion. Yesterday's drawing is excellent, complex, and simple; All of this at the same time!
My process is transitioning. I can feel myself increasing the pace. More quickly I acknowledge intuitive justification as necessary response to image in front of me. More and more I feel inevitability in my retort. I am required by my personal nature to respond as I do. My pace of response is increasing. I am more sure the path I take is the proper one. Now I am in a fast walk. Soon I will be running.  "The Doctrine of Liberty" (2019 No.1, state 11), oil on canvas, 66x59.5 inches {"I believe there is a golden thread which alone gives meaning to the political history of the West, from Marathon to Alamein, from Solon to Winston Churchill and after. This I chose to call the doctrine of liberty under the law." -Anthony Sampson, "The Changing Anatomy of Britain", 1982} I am beginning to wake up earlier than usual. My anxiety is increasing. I have begun to worry about my upcoming exhibitions. I need to plan well. I need to get all my ducks in a row. There will be an overlap in two exhibits: AVA Gallery, Lebanon, NH (April 29 thru June 14) and Bromfield Gallery, Boston, MA (June 3 thru June 30). The overlap in timing is nerve-racking because I want to show my most recent works at both galleries. During the last week of the AVA show I will swap a few pieces out, moving them to Bromfield. The best of my most recent work will be at both Bromfield and AVA for their openings.
I will begin to plan both shows today. This will relieve some of my anxiety. Trying to insure my best work is seen everywhere, whenever and wherever it is shown, is a big anxiety maker. Yesterday I nicely brought the painting, "The Doctrine of Liberty", to near-conclusion. This is reassuring. However, making art is so important to me, so imbedded in my psyche as necessary to balance and quietude, that I get anxious when I think about giving up the making of art in order to mount an exhibition.  Drawing 02·13·2019, pencil on paper, 20x16 inches Every so often I stretch, pull out the kinks, ask basic questions. Such is the drawing I show today. It does not strike me as particularly inspired. It does look like a simple application of ideas known, ideas that required themselves to be questioned again. I proceed on an inevitable path. Inevitability is defined by taking step after step with resounding intuitive knowledge.
 "The Doctrine of Liberty" (2019 No.1, state 10), oil on canvas, 66x59.5 inches {"I believe there is a golden thread which alone gives meaning to the political history of the West, from Marathon to Alamein, from Solon to Winston Churchill and after. This I chose to call the doctrine of liberty under the law." -Anthony Sampson, "The Changing Anatomy of Britain", 1982}  Drawing 02·12·2019, pencil on paper, 16x20 inches Almost, but it is not perfect yet! "The Doctrine of Liberty" looks like one more day of work till completion. It is an incredible painting, incredibly profound and rich. I accept its ending will not be perfect — its completion will bring questions that will drive me to seek answers in my next painting. The process has taken over. The result of an answer is a new question. This Q&A method is exactly the way yesterday's drawing was made.
|
To read my profile go to MEHRBACH.com.
At MEHRBACH.com you may view many of my paintings and drawings, past and present, and see details about my life and work. Archives
September 2023
|
RSS Feed