These drawing were exhilarating in the making. The reproductions are OK; good enough for you to see the yellowness of the paper used in the third drawing. I am never truly satisfied with reproductions: Reality is so much better! But, you do get the idea by looking here. You do not get the full impact that comes with the real, the genuine, the true. No surprise there.
Busy days continue. I hope all is well with you, my dedicated readers and viewers. Happy Holidays!
These are days of more darkness than light. These are days filled with friends and family. These are days of enjoyment and celebration. These are days when I get confused. I lose some self identity. Art saves me. Art grounds me. Art pulls me back to center. Art allows me to be comfortable with celebration. Art allows me to accept less light than darkness. Art allows continued belief in my integrity. Today I show two drawings from yesterday. The first is yesterday's second drawing, which I think is a self-portrait. The second may be a self-portrait as well. Dedicated readers know I have spent less time in the studio than usual. These drawings are me looking for myself.
Drawings-12·13·2015, pencil on paper, 20X16 inches
Today I had my yearly physical exam. Always traumatic for me. Not because there is something wrong, but because I fear something is wrong. That something would be something of which I have no awareness. I began to feel this anxiety a few days ago, but it peaked yesterday. Consequently, I lacked concentration in the studio. Consequently, I made strangely detached drawings. Yes, strange, but true.
Drawings-12·11·2015 (Nos. 1 & 2), pencil on paper, 16X20 & 20X16 inches
The world is in conflicts so many. Perhaps whimsy helps. The man in drawing #1 says "Stop!" The bird in drawing #2 raises his legs in confused alarm because a projectile has been sent his way. The mystery of conflictual reasoning is as reasonable as these drawings are whimsical.
A day in the studio is not number 1, or number 2, or number 3. It is a gathering of information. It is research. Amazingly endless, it teaches while it exalts! Selfish, some would say, because it is paying homage to myself. Seeking myself is as mysterious as seeking a higher order in the universe. It is there and it is to be discovered and revealed. Such is my work.
Drawings 12/08/2015, pencil on paper, 20X16 and 16X20 inches
When I say "I've been away!" I just mean I have been out of the studio. Yesterday (after 4 days away) I returned. This is what I did. I am always amazed, upon a return, by that which I do. At all times my art feels a bit alien, but never as much as when I have not made any for a few days. Such was yesterday. Enjoyable? A surprise? Yes and yes! Instructive? Yes! It is good, solid work. Solid, in this context, has two meanings: It is excellent, and the forms are concretely three-dimensional.
Fascinating, isn't it?
Usually I show the painting I did yesterday first, then the drawing. Not today! I find the newest state of "Crazy Love" problematical. It is in need of repair. Thus the drawing first, which is a good one.
"Crazy Love" is going through a grand transition, as am I. I am coming to terms with the figurative impetus of my soul, mixed as it is with a visually abstract, non-concrete universe. Yesterday's drawing began as a study for "Crazy Love", but it quickly took its own direction. Two remnants in yesterday's drawing refer to "Crazy Love". They are the heart and the distorted, ex-body head. The current ex-body head will be substantially repainted. I am also imagining (during this writing) the appearance of a second head in the bottom right quadrant.
Walt Whitman wrote it better than I (see Whitman's poem at end of today's Blog Post).
I am the flinging spider, looking for things to hold onto. Moving from one hold to another, always... "Ceaselessly musing, venturing, throwing,—seeking the spheres, to connect them; Till the bridge [I form be a] ductile anchor hold; Till the gossamer thread [I] fling, catch somewhere, O my Soul."
Spider Fling, by Walt Whitman
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