I call now the middle of my journey. This lesson in life, in Art, is I had to arrive at the middle before I could take a step toward full, self-realization. This drawing is important; it focuses on the most natural to me, i.e., inventing interesting, biomorphic forms. These biomorphic forms are beyond my natural self, they are reality, they have profound meaning.
I was born with an identity, but an identity that I cannot easily perceive. Here I am, finding it. I am slowly unravelling that which is compounded by genetics and experience. I am unscrambling the fusion that is me. But, Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle pertains. When I touch, when I comprehend one bit of my identity, I alter everything during the touch. I evolve. Momentum does appear to be the most important element of the drive. The instinct is to continue in the given, the discovered, the unraveling direction. I know I must proceed with questions and caution. I fear self-deception in the same way I fear death. Both death and deception end in the loss of identity.
These are days of more darkness than light. These are days filled with friends and family. These are days of enjoyment and celebration. These are days when I get confused. I lose some self identity. Art saves me. Art grounds me. Art pulls me back to center. Art allows me to be comfortable with celebration. Art allows me to accept less light than darkness. Art allows continued belief in my integrity. Today I show two drawings from yesterday. The first is yesterday's second drawing, which I think is a self-portrait. The second may be a self-portrait as well. Dedicated readers know I have spent less time in the studio than usual. These drawings are me looking for myself.
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