The painting "How's It Gonna End?" (2019 No.2) begins as usual for these recent times. I have a feeling. I don't know where it's going. How is it going to end? Thank you to Tom Waits for helping me verbalize my consistently mysterious process. I relish this path. I accept the step by step as exciting, a murder mystery unraveling. I killing the white canvas, replacing it with marks, paint and color. "A tree born crooked will never grow straight. She sunk like a hammer into the lake. A long lost letter and an old leaky boat. Promises are never meant to keep. And I want to know, the same thing everyone wants to know, How's it going to end?"
How's It Gonna End?
Out-loud thinking is becoming obsolete. Processing never dies. Telling the truth is mandatory, albeit nearly impossible. Verbal truth is more difficult than visual truth. Words are like nails. Images, not so much. Images are full of nuance. Nuance is required to communicate clearly, precisely. Deeds are a test of veracity. Images can be good or images can be bad. I am uncomfortable looking at yesterday's visual activity. That is helpful. It leaves me wanting more. The unravelling mystery calls me back. It's like a good mystery novel, the ending is obscured because of factual insufficiency. I must return to unravel that which is known yet not apparent.
I am over this one. I am done with the painting 2010 No.10. Yon I go. This painting was a long time coming, but it came. Yonder is a mystery, but I am anxious for the perceptive unknowing that leads to realization. There is here. There means a new painting will begin. The genesis of a new work is a mystery I enjoy. Look at yesterday's drawing! I did not see this one coming. There are times in my artistic life that I simply allow without vigor. This drawing represents me being there, immersed without critical review. I followed it where it wanted to go. Does this make it good? No, but the meditation it represents is mindful. There is some there, there.
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