I always think it is going to get easier. I keep thinking more knowledge will have this great benefit; that is, my pathway to finished works will become quicker, more efficient. Turns out this is not so. This drawing took me two days and many, many revisions. It is a good one, but to get here I used every resource at my disposal, all my knowledge and all my knowing. To me, this drawing represents a promise. I can do it. I am capable of finding pathways to substantial of works of art. With each work of art I just have to accept the work that is necessary to get to the substance.
Making art will never get easier. It will continually become more energy intensive. In other words, the more I know the more I understand the complexity required to obtain a great solution.
This drawing took a lot of time, hours and hours. Sometimes I know everything feels very difficult during the process of making art, I can't quite get things to jive, or feel like they jive. Yesterday was one of those times. I know I am erratic in my self-acceptance, Perhaps this is a great drawing. Perhaps I had difficulty sorting out truth because I had so much flowing through my head; recent work, recent successes, and recent questions, some answered well, some not so well. In any case, it is days like this that I know problem solving is not a straight line, but a spiraling loop. On my problem solving way I experience erratic emotions. Elation and despair, discomfort and self-confidence; various emotions occur from day to day. Comfort is impossible to sustain.
There are multifarious ends facing me. One has immediacy. The idea of my mortality and eventual silence is the scariest. My here & now involvement in the End of the Year celebrations, and holidays, is the most demanding. I am a social animal, as well as a spiritual/Intellectual/emotional one. I have family. I have myself. Conflicts arise and overwhelm. Particularly at this time of the year, during this particular Ending. The process is not pretty; perhaps the outcome will be. I am trying to make here & now work well for me and for the people in my life, friends and family. I need generous amounts of time in the studio to feel comfortable with myself. Recently that time has been compromised, reduced by the many preparations to celebrate. Hopefully the celebrations will diminish my conflicts. Best I can expect is my memory will be altered by their success. I hope good memories will not make them too ugly to repeat.
Yesterday I made one drawing in one hour. It is informative. I want to pursue the simplicity of its central form. Soon a painting will come that takes this simplicity as most important. Look at the painting 2017 No.13 in reproduction. It is difficult to see it well in this small form. In the studio this painting sings. It is large, a width of 71 inches (180 cm). There are also problems in reproducing color and value. I made a postcard of 2017 No.13; its image looks cramped in a 5x7 inch format. To get attention, for people to wish to explore my art more fully, more correctly, and in person, I have to get their attention. This will be done best if I make a few works that reproduce well in small formats, such as on a 5x7 inch postcard... always nice to have a new goal.
Whatever you see in this drawing I see a reverse triangle that instigates great compositional vigor. I have noted before that Picasso utilized a tried and true center triangle in his masterpiece Guernica. Picasso's triangle is so forced as give the viewer boredom after multiple viewings. This highest clarity of composition does allow Picasso to invent incredibly rich, novel, and greatly emotive forms. It allowed Picasso to perform with intuitive abandon on a rigidly organized frontal compositional assault. Marvelous it is that Picasso absorbs the viewer in the active emotional strife of his characters. These hurt and screaming figures reside comfortably within a securely balanced image. Security versus chaos is Picasso greatest theme. Giving the viewer security, so they may feel comfort while they view chaos, is the reason I am deeply influenced by Picasso's best paintings, drawings, and prints.
Returning to my drawing of yesterday: What I have called a "reverse triangle" can be found with one of its points cut at the bottom of my drawing. It moves the viewer up and around the two major forms on the right. Those forms, juxtaposed as they are by spherical versus cubic centers, each play with dissimilarity against the other. This occurs comfortably because they reside nicely in a secure, upside-down triangle. To be absolutely correct, there is no triangle there! My "reverse triangle" has its bottom point cut to flatness. Mathematicians call this shape a trapezoid.
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