From the day I began to make art I have had a dream of being able to make art with pure pleasure, unmarred by struggle. It isn't going to happen. I can not count the number of times people have said to me things like, "You must enjoy painting so much," or "How lucky you are to have an activity which gives you such great pleasure." Neither statement is true, though, like others, I have sought making art with the dream of it becoming a pure and simple pleasure. It is, rather, a struggle to get it right, a struggle for perfection, and ultimately the act of seeking the impossible goal of true expression. My return to the painting "Windows" illustrates my difficulties, and my acceptance of my plight. This painting is much better than it was before I returned to it a couple of days ago, but it will require much effort to resolve and complete. Most annoying is the man's enormous head on the right, but that is only one of many problems which require solutions. This painting is beyond a sketch, but it is far from resolution.
I like the drawing I made yesterday. It is a continued push on human form as expression. There is a bend in the man's head which plays well against the frown of the woman. The man does not know the structure of his momentary relationship with the woman. Our inability to read his feelings is apt.
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