This is a time of my gathering presence. After all, I have gotten the fundamentals down. I draw with fluidity, and seamless contact with my intuition. I have always questioned the subject matter of my work: Does it make sense to draw what I draw? I am beginning to accept this question as unimportant, but I am not in full acceptance of that premise. As I write this I feel insecure. Being insecure is being human, but it is a constant, and heavy, burden of me the artist. Insecurity is the major reason I make art.
Yesterday's two drawings exhibit my newfound acceptance of insecurity, and the need to have more 2-dimensional space to look for truth. I posted yesterday's second drawing first (above). It took several hours. It is on the largest paper I am currently using (16 X 20 inches). That's a lot space to cover with 0.7 mm pencil stroke! More importantly, the development is similar to that of a painting. The room to seek and hunt in such a large space is wonderfully open. My better acceptance, and the larger space, has opened a door. I walked through. The drawings are better. More importantly, I am totally absorbed when I draw: me and drawing are one. This total engagement is new: my personality disappears, the ego is gone, there is nothing between me and it.
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